Really, it’s true. My professional life demands a strong, healthy, 150% on the go, Mel. And when I’m on, I am on. Thankfully, I’ve learned to put aside this darn ailment and move forward when my work world or daughter needs me. Today, in fact, I was asked for directions while visiting Siteman Cancer Center for my six month check up. Dressed up in a suit and heels, I appeared more a pharmaceutical rep than a girl with cancer. I teared up to myself after having to admit I too was there as a patient.
Age, sweats, a doo rag to cover lost hair or a suit and pearls, cancer most certainly does not discriminate.
My daughter asked me this week what I wanted for my birthday. I said a new body. She offered a Barbie. At 41, I accept. It has a new body, comes with a thong, has larger breasts and lipstick that never fades. How can I lose? And have you ever seen that bumper sticker that the cool biker chics wear that says, “I wanna be like Barbie, that “bit_h” has everything.” Again, I point out, how can I lose?
All those years of being a serious cyclist, yogi and a regular workout girl are on hold, but darn it, they will be back. Law of attraction, my friends! Law of attraction. It just has taken longer than expected. And damn, I’m ready. I feel guilty for sleeping so much and have to stay home more than my friends and family would prefer. But it is what it is. I go 150 mph all week and have to crash sometime.
Today however, that was validated. It wasn’t an ideal visit, as it turns out I am not as far along on the path as hoped at six months and some meds will require adjustment with repeat radio-iodine treatments in Feb (and sadly, no bell), meaning, yes, I get to glow again and go through the treatment a repeat time with a smaller dose and another body scan. BUT it could be worse -much worse -and for that I am grateful, so no worries, I will chin up, see myself fixed in time, take my AARP-sized pill-box of meds and be back to a new me at some time in the future. For now, I choose moment to moment and a new promise of hope.
My sweet girl told me another great story this week. She asked my mom what her friends talk about, and mom’s reply to my 6th grader was “we talk about the boyfriends we don’t have, flowers and surgery.” lol! Perhaps for my birthday this week, someone should purchase a gardening handbook. A Barbie and some flowers seems appropriate in light of the silliness I enjoy each day. 🙂
On the upside, I couldn’t do a week such as this without a Murphy moment. In addition to today’s madness, I have scheduled some additional radiology tests for tomorrow morning not realizing the time needed to take each, and yes, just before a good size Toastmaster’s meeting I organized at work. Nothing like some intense GI work prior to public speaking to make a girl’s day, think?
Simply put, I am too busy for cancer.
Thank you for believing in me, and knowing I will kick cancer’s arse! I will because of your love and support.