Grow a goiter, get a goiter.
Four years ago in an effort to win a work halloween costume contest, I created a character. I don’t have a Crazy Aunt Delilah, but I thought something bigger than life and more creative than the standard Target purchase was a must. I was, afterall, the quirky (or I liked to imagine) head of the Marcomm team for a medical equipment company.
I visited the local thrift shop and selected a lovely floral housecoat but jazzed up my look with hot pink lipstick (over the teeth of course), many pearls, a flowing black Hannah Montana wig and a fantastically designed goiter with those awful nude colored pantyhose no woman ever chooses unless she is over 80. (forgive me grandma, your knee highs were darling, and we loved you for being fearless to wear them as kneehighs. You, HS, rocked a pair!). Crazy aunt Delilah, not so much.
The New York accent was a hit and the boa got me many hugs and several bizarre looks from the uptight stiffs in the office. Nonetheless, $100 at stake, and I wanted that prize.
I only took second.
HOWEVER, the goiter crafted by pantyhose actually became a real goiter two years later. Karma or Murphy’s law?
I should definitely get my $100 now.